Meltem Yucel, a recent postdoctoral researcher in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience at Duke University, led a recent study. This fascinating work uncovered the complex gossiping behaviors, from preschool to undergraduates. The study sheds new light on the powerful role that gossip may play in determining whether friendships grow or wither.
Gossip gets a bad rap. It’s reputation often precedes it, casting stigma on gossip as a wholly negative behavior. The research indicates that gossip itself isn’t bad. Nearly two-thirds of study subjects found it more desirable to learn flattering rumors about their own characters. Yet, about one in three people were less than comfortable with those conversations. The study’s findings indicate that narcissistic men are particularly drawn to gossip. Indeed, about 15% of gossip enthusiasts have narcissistic personalities.
The Fascination with Gossip
Yucel’s interest in gossip began in her childhood in Turkey. At the time, whenever she would try to participate in adult conversations, she would be dismissed. This formative experience deepened her consciousness of the social impact that gossip could have. This allowed for a deep exploration of this phenomenon across five experiments with more than 1,000 participants, providing strong evidence.
The researchers found that men are more inclined than women to signal interest in gossip. This somewhat predictable finding with the broader literature on social dynamics points to potentially gendered differences in willingness to gossip.
“When I was a kid, if I ever wanted to comment on gossip, I’d be shushed or told not to get involved in adult conversations,” – Meltem Yucel
The implications of these findings are profound. Gossip serves as an equalizing and enforcement tool. It really is the invisible glue that sets the tone for a group, though, and can make people feel welcomed or excluded.
Social Dynamics and Emotional Responses
Gossip affects friendships and social circles in several ways. Positive gossip deepens relationships and builds community. Conversely, bad-mouthing can foster alienation and undermine self-esteem. Important to note, about 85 percent of participants were against being the subject of negative gossip, pointing to its harmful consequences.
Andrew Hales, an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Mississippi, pointed out the double-edged sword nature of gossip and its effects.
“Gossip has a bad reputation for a reason: no one wants to be talked about behind their back,” – Andrew Hales
As much as he understood the power of gossip, Hales understood its paradoxical nature. As a rule of thumb, everyone likes to be included in something flattering more than they like to be excluded.
“But at the same time, people don’t want to be ignored either. So, if your only options are being gossiped about or being seen as so insignificant that no one even mentions you, both feel negative, just in very different ways,” – Andrew Hales
The emotional responses that gossip elicits tells us a great deal about the human character. If people are afraid to be gossiped about in unpleasant terms, then at the same time they’re incentivized to pursue informal recognition through flattering talk.
The Narcissism Connection
The research particularly gained attention for showing the relationship between narcissism and gossip. Narcissists think they’re entitled to unending admiration. They can even co-opt negative rumors about them, interpreting it as accolades when the intent was to undermine. Among people who love to gossip, narcissistic tendencies were evident 15% of the time.
Hales made the case again for the complicated interaction between these characteristics and the way people behave.
“Narcissists often feel entitled and special, so they may believe gossip about them is positive, even if it’s clearly negative,” – Andrew Hales
This theory helps us understand why some people might be more prone to gossip than others. The social impulses that underlie this behavior may sometimes clash in unpredictable fashion.
This finding indicates that differences between individuals greatly influence how people view and react to negative or critical dialogue about themselves.
“But one thing that really surprised me is that within each of those, the preferences were not universal. About a third of participants said they didn’t want to be the focus of positive gossip,” – Andrew Hales
This observation suggests that individual differences significantly shape how people perceive and respond to discussions about themselves.